NOT The End
Self-Help BOOK
Fiction BOOKS
Self Care Part 1
Self Care Part 2
Self Care Part 3
My Philosophy
Creative People
OK to Be Happy

Are you frustrated in your relationship?  

You can learn to be authentic, autonomous & creative…
WHILE being in a connected, loving relationship.

The key is to have a healthy, committed bond with yourself!  

That’s difficult if you were raised in an unhealthy family... because your internal relationship with yourself may be based on self-judgment instead of self-love.  

But you can learn to re-wire your psyche by identifying and controlling the negative, "menacing" voice inside of you...and replacing IT with a strong, "mentor" to continually support yourself in a natural, positive way.  

It will take some “work,” but once you do that…EVERYTHING will fall into place.
The Self-Mentoring Guidebook will get you started.  Stick with it and take your time.

Do the steps in the guidebook together and share each step of the process along the way. 

Talk after each step and go slowly.(Best to each have your own guidebook because there are exercises that are completely on your own, so you will be sharing your experience...NOT THE USUAL COUPLES WORK.)

You might be confused, disappointed, or frustrated by a sexual issue

Trapped in old-fashion stereotypical gender roles.

Out of touch
with your partner.

Overwhelmed by the demands of your relationship.

Misunderstood and lacking the right communication skills.

Trying to decide if this person is right for you!

The Guidebook is all about you learn and grow and then SHARE.No fancy exercises, no back rubs or candle-light...just self-discovery and then sharing.

When we get really upset with our partner, it is often about some unresolved issue from our past.  Just learning to recognize this helps put the current conflict in perspective.   These feelings of anger or pain are usually rooted in childhood experiences of rejection or mistreatment. But they are no less potent when we are “triggered.”   

Pausing as a couple to take note of what is really going on…especially together, can not only end the suffering, but actually deepen the bond, and pave the path to intimacy.  

We tend to seek in our partners someone we recognize as being able to complete the unfinished business of childhood, and heal its wounds. The trouble is that this kind of person is likely to possess very similar characteristics to the person who wounded you in the first place.  

After all, the great healing fantasy is that a withdrawn father would one day hug you and hold you close, while listening to all of your  intimate feelings.  Or an overly critical mother would suddenly offer unconditional approval of you.  Or an abusive sibling would magically stop harassing you, and become your favorite playmate.  

The first rush of attraction and love is fueled by the unconscious hope that we have found someone capable of righting the old wrongs.  And chances are that you have either found the perfect person to heal those old wounds with…or a carbon copy of the original trauma.  The opportunity is to either heal and grow closer, or move on from the relationship.  

Listening to Each Other  

One of the most valuable skills you can learn (or brush up on) is how to get inside each other’s point of view and fully understand it and validate it, without necessarily having to agree. After all, a great deal of resentment – that giant relationship killer – comes from simply not feeling heard.  

When you work with the guidebook together (you'll each need your own)...and SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCE...the Guidebook for Self-Mentoring can help you both to to learn how to:     

*  Create a safe place in which your relationship can flower.    

*  Communicate with each other in an honest, non-defensive way.    

*  Become your partner's best friend and healer.    

*  Understand what triggers your partner's behavior.    

*  Understand why you have chosen each other.    

*  Heal old relationships and childhood wounds.   

*  Eliminate and reduce frustrations.    

*  Rekindle romance and passion.    

*  Expand the boundaries of your sexual intimacy.    

*  Rediscover the joy and the spiritual potential of your relationship.